🧠 CHAPTER 1: The Modern Buyer Brain: "Playing Defence vs Designing Membership"

From Defense to Membership Offense

Okay, let's get into this first one here. So most brands today, they're playing defense. They're running around, they're plugging churn leaks. They're fighting every cancellation, which is good. You have to do it. But they're really just chasing that next acquisition hack, like it's a scratch lottery ticket, but the whole time they're really missing the actual point.

They're trying to stop customers from leaving. Instead of designing an experience people actually want to stay a part of. And here's the truth, no one is really willing to say out loud and direct to consumer. Loyalty is usually just convenience. Wearing a fake mustache. If a customer leaves the moment, a competitor offers faster shipping or a better pickup option like we saw during COVID, that wasn't loyalty, that was inertia.

And COVID actually proved this in real time before COVID. So many brands walked around bragging about their loyal customer base, but the second curbside pickup wasn't available, or shipping took too long, or maybe inventory dried up a little bit. During COVID. Those quote unquote loyal customers disappeared faster than my pre pandemic gym motivation.

They literally. Went wherever was easiest. And this wasn't betrayal. This was just the true hierarchy of modern loyalty, which is convenience, availability, and whatever the store actually had or what, what, whatever store actually had toilet paper. Uh, McKinsey actually reported that 75% of consumers switched brands during COVID purely because of fulfillment, not product fulfillment.

Let that sink in for a second. Those stores all thought they had loyal customers, 75%. So the lesson is simple. Loyalty wasn't loyalty, it was simply the absence of a better option, and that's where the shift happens. Defense versus offense. Here's how to know if your brand is playing defense. You only talk to your customer when they're trying to leave.

That's the first sign you treat retention as a cancellation flow instead of an experience. And don't get me wrong, cancellation flows are important, but it's not loyalty. Your onboarding is a, is one lonely order confirmation email if that's all they get, that's you're playing defense, your marketing budget.

Is probably 80% acquisition and probably 20% guilt and desperation in trying to win people back. That's defense. Offense looks different. Offense is designing a membership that people would actually miss if you took it away. Offense is building belonging, not bribing people with points. Offense is engineering and identities.

Customer. Customers opt into 'cause here's what membership really is. Membership is. I choose to stay even though I don't have to. Amazon Prime is a perfect example of this. You're not loyal to Amazon. You're locked into an ecosystem that you'd have to amputate yourself out of. Literally prime. Alexa Prime video.

Amazon photos, grocery, same day early access to think about everything that you have connected, even if you don't use half of it. It all stacks into perceived value, and that perceived value is what creates stickiness. McKinsey actually found that paid membership customers spend four times more than.

Annually than non-paid members. Why? Paid membership actually changes behavior. It trains customers to make your brand their default option and they actually skip the comparison step entirely. Think about your Amazon Prime membership. You don't price shop everything because you have the convenience of that prime membership.

You know you're gonna get it in a couple days. It's just easy, convenient, so you don't even bother your price sensitivity is completely removed. Now, let me say something you won't hear. In most subscription talks, churn is not the problem. Churn is the symptom. So people say you have a churn problem.

No, there's no such thing as a churn problem. You, the symptom is churn. If your churn is high, the disease actually happened way earlier. That's just the symptom. I'm gonna go a little deeper on this analogy, but your disease churn it. Start. It started at acquisition. It starts early on and it continued It spread through onboarding, and then it probably came roaring back every month because your membership had no emotional connection.

No, no connection to the customer. Brands love to say retention starts the moment people want to cancel. No retention starts. The second they hit check, hit checkout. The second before they've even got their first order is when retention truly starts. There's actually a dopamine spike that happens like the, it's been proven and studies have shown that the second people checkout is the peak moment of hit of dopamine.

When people shop, the brain chemistry actually lights up. And what do most brands do that moment? They send a generic thanks for your order. Email, and then. That's it. Silence for a week, and then maybe you get your order and maybe 10 days later you get an email asking for a review. By, by the time that product arrives, the dopamine's gone, the excitement's gone.

And emotionally the customer barely remembers you. The box shows up at the door and they forget what's in there until they open it. I'm sure you've had that experience. Actually, I just had that earlier today. A box came, I, I didn't even know what was in it. That's how little connection. I had with the brand.

Now compare that to the brands that actually get this right email one. The second they place it reinforce the decision they just made. Yes, they made the decision online, but your job. Forever is to continually sell them on that product in a month, in six months. They still need to be reinforced of that decision they just made.

So, yes, they just purchased your product, but email number one, reinforce why they just made the best decision. Yes, show them more case studies, testimonials, videos, everything. Email number two. Showcase what other members have done or achieved or done with the product. Now, this doesn't just apply to health stuff.

It can be like maybe you're selling. Legos, I anything. Show what other people have built a show, what other people are doing with the product, how it's changing their lives, how it's helping them. Case studies, email Number three, show some behind the scenes of how the product is made, uh, your company behind the scenes of in your office, like literally anything, like get them connected to you.

Email number four, maybe. Uh, something that makes them wanna join a club or a group or a community that you're a part of. You could actually probably send a few emails the first day, and that customer is not gonna be upset if you don't email them for two weeks and then you email them three times in a month.

They're gonna probably report that as spam, but if I place an order and within the first day I get an email, the second I place the order, two hours later I get another, another email like, here's some communities you should join. FA couple hours later, I get another email. Here's three easy ways to get started.

Once you get your product in a couple days, they're not gonna be upset, they're excited. The dopamine hit is there. Keep that going. So by the time that first order arrives, they're not just a buyer, they're becoming. A member. And that's the whole secret here. That's the shift. Membership changes everything.

Membership is identity. It's status, it's access, it's community, it's purpose, membership it's an emotional contract. It's not a transactional contract. Membership says you're one of us now, if you get less than five subscriptions a day in your business, you should be calling every single one of them.

Every single one, you should call and say, Hey, I just wanna thank you for subscribing. I'm curious why you subscribed. What did you, what made you choose it? Is there anything we can improve to better? If you track the people, the cohort of the people that you got ahold of and talked to versus the people that you, that you didn't, I bet you their LTV is three minimum, three times more than the people that you never spoke to.

So when you treat membership as offense and not defense your relationship with the customer changes because customers don't want more subscriptions. They actually want more belonging. Subscriptions is the transactional piece that comes along with that belonging. It's not, subscription is not belonging.

Okay, so let me fast forward to where the world is going because. By 2030, almost every major brand will behave like a ma, a membership business. We're starting to see it already. Even if they never ship a replenishment subscription, they will have a membership component. Why? Well, because membership is the only model that actually aligns value on both sides.

Brands get predictable revenue, which is awesome. Customers get a predictable experience and everyone wins. It's actually better being treated like a member than it is by being treated like a customer. And you know this with the most elite brands in the world. If you're a the highest level of a airline or a credit card, you're a member.

You're not a customer. Subscriptions are not about convenience anymore. They're about reducing friction for an overloaded. Impatient buyer who expects you to know them. They just expect it. They expect personalization. They expect control. They expect recognition. They expect to get something from being part of the group.

And by the way, they'll reward you for it too. Studies show that members are actually four times more valuable, 63% more likely to choose your brand again, and 53% more likely to refer someone when they're a member. Why? Membership programs don't just sell products, membership programs, engineer habits.

They train customers to think. Inside your ecosystem, they anchor spending around your brand. They make your store the first place they look, not the fourth, fifth, or sixth tab. They compare because they're a member there. In fact, they might not even compare. This is the future. This is what wins. This is what makes everything else you do 10 times more valuable.

Every ad, 10 times more roas when someone is a member and not just a customer, but the brands who get here first. The ones who stop playing defense, who stop patching churn holes like landlords in a student apartment. I have some rental properties, so I know what that's like. They're the ones who stop duct taping their customer journey together with panic and discounts and exit offers and exit intent offers.

And, you know, you, you have to do that. But that the one that, if that's all your strategy is you can't save your way into loyalty. You design your way intentionally into it. So here's my challenge. This week is five. I'm gonna give you five concrete steps to build offense this week. Number one, do a defense audit List every part of your customer experience that exists purely to stop churn.

And if it only activates when the customer is leaving, it goes on that list. So anything you do that is a churn preventer, just identify it. Not saying get rid of it, you have to have them there. But I do a defense audit, so at least you know what you're doing defensively. Now, step number two, define your belonging promise.

Write in one sentence, right? Sorry. Write. Write one sentence that answers What does someone gain? Emotionally or socially, when they become a member of your brand, what do they gain? If you can't answer it, I promise you, neither can your customers. What do your customers gain emotionally, socially, community spiritually what do they gain when they become a member of your brand?

Number three. Create one member membership benefit beyond product. Okay, so beyond what the customer gets, this is my challenge to you is make sure you have one extra benefit that customers get, not a discount and not points. That's the key. Something real. Something that is a benefit other than the product and not a discount and not points.

I do think having a discount on points are important, but something above and beyond that early access maybe member only pricing. So that's like a little bit different than giving a discount, like VIP pricing, member perks member access to exclusive products. Uh, a private group, exclusive drops.

Ship one member perk this month that your members get. Number four, fix your first 24 hours. So I think your first 24 hours should look like that four email sequence that we talked about earlier. Step number one, one, reinforce the purchase. Two, tell your story. Three. Educate. Four preview what's coming? And this is just in the first 24 hours.

Just a reminder, this is not the first week. This is the first 24 hours. Okay? And then number five, last one. Create a referral mechanic that actually matters. This is. No 10% codes no share. 10, get 10. Give your members something worth sharing that they can give to someone in their life, close to them. A free month, a free, valuable product, a real benefit that they would be proud to share.

I know you've probably signed up for something and gotten a link. Give your friends 10% off. Would you go post that on social media? It should be something that your members would text. A friend or a family member and share with them. If your offer isn't that valuable, it's not a real referral offer that makes a difference.

So do these five things and you're gonna stop playing defense entirely. You'll be designing a membership that customers actually want to, you'll belong to. That's when growth stops being acquisition versus retention. And it starts being, the growth starts being inevitable. Okay, now I'm gonna be doing.

Nine more of these. This is all coming from a concept of the buyer brain membership. This is the first of 10, so if you're interested to prove your, how you approach your customers and the new buyer brain of consumers in, in the modern era, make sure you listen to the next nine ones. There'll be, they'll be coming out shortly.

Thanks so much.